Baby talks. It’s complicated and very personal. Most women these days hate the kind of conversation. In Korea, the first of 7 biggest sins of a woman is not producing a baby boy. My friend’s been trying for 4,5 years to have a baby and started her way to IVF which I think too early but she insisted upon pressure from the extended family & society. My other friend need to let go her husband getting married again for the second time in the pursue of a child, only to know that she didn’t want his love to be shared and decided to divorce. My bestfriend B decided she didn’t want to have child at all, getting a lot of family pressure but she didn’t care.
At first, I was ‘a normal’ want family with a lot of children type. But then after what’s happened in my life, I am very scared with the prospect of social pressure in having children. It’s traumatic and I’m not exaggerating. It’s very easy to point out & judge that the wife has the problem and thus need ‘treatments’. As Em said, it’s a mean conspiracy.
I talked to a friend on our trip together, she said someone just proposed her. I was excited to hear the news, but she remain calm. “But I said no.”
I said, “But why??”
“He said he wants to marry me so I can take care of his children from his previous marriage. Dude, I’m no babysitter.”
And he talked like that to my friend who’s an independent & successful business owner, who have all the best options in her life, and obviously need more than ‘that’ kind of proposal.
My own experience also told me, some men can express they want 13 children with me. Or my parents want grandchildren. I mean, I love children. It’s the waiting, the pressure and uncertainty that kills me.
As I said, I love children. I have children that born from my heart. And for now, it’s more than enough.